Visons of sugar plums danced in my head

I had a great week. It was Christmas and I enjoyed so many fun festivities. However, two nights in a row I dreamed that I had eaten some candy. I just popped them in my mouth, chewed and swallowed. Then seconds later I realized what I had done and my whole year and blog was in ruins. Did I forget I wasn't eating sugar any more? How could this happen? Then I woke up. I was so happy that I had not messed up my 1 year of anti-sugatarianism. The next night was the exact same dream. I wondered why I kept having this dream. Maybe with all of the extra Christmas sweets lying around, my subconscious mind was working overtime. On Christmas Eve, I kept catching myself having little thoughts of popping sugar-filled things into my mouth. My hand never reached out to grab one because I caught my thought process in time, but I was amazed at how automatic it is just to put things into your mouth. I really had to remind myself and it wasn't necessarily that I was tempted because I really wasn't. It was just an automatic thing.
This week I passed on a whole party table full of desserts and treats, eggnog and ice cream drinks, candied apple cider. We made gingerbread houses from scratch with lots of left over candies and frosting. Christmas Eve brought more cookies and fudge, caramels, candies and hot chocolate. Lots of plates were brought over full of wonderful things. The traditional Christmas pudding with nuts and cherries I passed on, will be there next year and the year after that. More cookies the day after and then more fudge making. Sunday night we played games with white fudge covered Oreos and don't forget the vanilla Pirouettes.

This week I said yes to Diet 7up. It really helped to have something crisp and pretty to drink. I also was generous to myself with the Martinellis. Our neighbors who are originally from Mexico, brought over homemade tamales. (they were Fantastic!) We went out to breakfast on Christmas Eve. We tried a new place in Monroe called the Hitchpost Cafe on Main street. I had a scramble (my favorite) filled with ham, sausage, bacon, cheese and all kinds of vegetables. It was awesome. For Christmas Eve, we had my favorite salad and Filet mignon and shrimp. Yum, yum, yum! Christmas day was ham, salad, and potatoes. I had fresh raspberries dipped in real whipped cream sweetened with 1 packet of equal. I did this for Thanksgiving and it has turned into my new favorite dessert. The rest of the days were filled with my favorite soups and leftovers. On Monday we went downtown to the Sheraton and saw some really fantastically made gingerbread houses, then to the Cheesecake Factory for lunch. What a wonderful week.
I tried to walk my dog every day for 30 minutes this week of Christmas. That was the only exercise I got and at the end of the week my weigh-in was down 2.6 lbs for the week. What a great gift that was! My total after 9 weeks is 14.2lbs.
I have been feeling good and I am so optimistic because I have made it through Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Now on to the New Year, my birthday, Valentines Day, and Easter. For me those are just as hard. I think Easter has the best candy ever. I think I'll still have to take it one day at a time but so far, so good.

My long black Darth Vador dress has left the building.

I gave my long black church dress away last week. This is the dress I wore when I was pregnant, or when I had just gained enough weight that nothing else fit. Before I started this no sugar quest, I was wearing it to every church function that I was to go. I hated that dress, but as a form of my own punishment, I was not to buy another dress, or wear another dress until my size dropped. So, the result of that was wearing that dress for probably a couple of months straight. A kind lady asked me if I was in mourning because she only saw me in black. I laughed and explained to her that I was punishing myself. I told her not to worry because I was on a better path and she could expect to see me wearing colors very soon. She has complimented me twice since she has seen me in different colors. I kissed that dress goodbye and have no regrets!

This week it has been interesting to see the layers unfold as I discover other bad habits that I have. I use to blame everything on my bad eating habits (sugar all the time). Now that I have good eating habits, I am seeing other areas I need to improve. The most blatant one is that I am not getting enough sleep. I find myself staying up way too late watching t.v. even when I still have to get up very early to help my kids get to school. There are no pick-me-uppers in the afternoon anymore (no soft drinks, or sugar jolts to keep me going). It is interesting to see myself in this very honest way. It's all about choices. I can go to bed earlier, or take a nap, or just be tired. But one thing I will not do is suffocate that feeling by drinking or eating something. HHmmmm.

Recount of my week:
This week my weight stayed the exact same. So after 8 weeks, that's a loss of 11.8 lbs.
This week I said no to a LOT of things: Oatmeal chocolate chip cookies, gourmet hot chocolate, dessert at the Claim Jumper, dessert at The Grange, cupcakes and cookies at a baby shower, a full table full of treats for our neighborhood nativity, eggnog with ice cream and 7up in it, hot apple cider with melted red hots, and a big spread of cookies at our Stake Christmas Devotional.
This week I said yes to: sugar free hot chocolate (when I first tasted this I spit it out in the sink thinking I was drinking a sugar-full cup. I had to check and had my kids taste it to verify it really was sugar free. They could definitely tell, but it wasn't obvious to me), tenderloin steak wrapped in bacon with mashed potatoes and carrots, and freshly squeezed orange juice which continues to be my all time favorite. I would also like to add that an apple a day really may keep the doctor away. It does wonders for me.

This week is Christmas and I am so excited for all of the fun activities. I am not feeling deprived and it doesn't feel hard to say no. I feel committed and am not craving things. I do indulge in the aroma of baked cookies etc but in the same whiff I pat myself on the stomach. That's my signal to myself that yes, the smell is enough! This week I dropped a size and I am now wearing a size 12 again. After Christmas, everything over size 12 will be gone. That is a gift I am giving myself. It feels good. I have felt very blessed and feel the warmth that the Christmas spirit brings.

I am starting a new movement called Anti-Sugatarian-ism

Would you like to join my movement? People with allergies and vegetarians and others get out of things they shouldn't eat, or don't want to eat, all the time (in a polite way), by just expressing their own medical title (allergic, diabetic) or ideological title (vegetarian, vegan). Sometimes don't we just need a title and that is excuse enough for whichever thing we don't want to participate in because we will become ill? Or because we just we don't want to? I actually think this is a pretty good idea. When sugar is offered to me I will say "No thank you, I'm an Anti-sugatarian". It seems to be the natural thing to do as well. Vegetarians cut meat out of their diet and gave themselves a name. I happen to think meat is good for the body (no offense to any vegetarians) and the thing that really needs to be taken out of the diet is the one thing that has no purpose or value. Sugar. Can I just take that out of the diet and give myself a name? Think of all the foods, vitamins and minerals that our body needs to survive and thrive. These include Protein, Dairy, Grains, Vegetable, Fruits, and Fats. Our body doesn't need sugar for ANYTHING. It's an excess.

Factoid: Not too long ago only the very rich people were able to eat any kind of sugar. And the people (slaves) who cleaned out their outhouses knew when they were partaking because their urine had a distinct foul smell because of the sugar. (Book: Sugar Blues) Doesn't that sound like a fun job?


My opinion is, if you are going to cut anything out of your diet, wouldn't you cut out the things that your body has no use for? You could save money by not buying things that are excess or of no real value. How much money do you spend on a drink every time you go out to eat?(No matter regular or Diet.) Water is free and actually does something for the body. Why would you buy a dessert when you are already stuffed to the max? Our bodies get nothing from it. They already have everything they need from the meal. Why would you spend an extra $10-15 per meal on drinks and dessert? Something that is of no value?
Cari's Tip:
Next time you go out for dessert order a yummy salad instead. It can be crunchy and fresh, simply delicious. Some of those are sweet enough anyways. At least you can get some fiber and vegetables, sometimes even fruit. Add an herbal tea with equal while friends are eating ice cream or pie. It will settle your stomach and add a little extra something your stomach is looking for. Notice how your waistline feels as you're leaving the restaurant and everyone else is complaining how stuffed they are. The walk to your car will be satisfying.

O.k., so calling all Anti-sugatarians. Who is with me?

Side notes: Lost another 1.4 for the week with no exercising other than walking my dog everyday. That's a total of 11.6 since October 26th. Today completes 7 weeks with 45 to go.

Turned down this week: Yummy (smelling) chocolate cake from Costco, ice cream with Scott, Christmas treats at the piano recital, gourmet hot chocolate at Ward Christmas party Saturday morning, and big box of yummy smelling fudge on Sunday.

What I said yes to this week: Crab, shrimp, salmon Louie, 8 huge shrimp on skewer, and crab stuffed mushrooms at the Crab Pot. Yum Yum!
Planters Select Nuts with Macademia, Almonds, and Cashews in sea salt. Yum!
Honey Sticks. (cinnamon is the best flavor)
AND lots of Christmas activities that were just as fun without eating sweets or gaining any weight. Now that's a great treat!
Have a good week everyone!

Feel the Fear and do it anyway.

This week I have been re-reading a book from my Sociology days at BYU. It is called "Feel the Fear and do it anyway" by Susan Jeffers Ph.D.. It has been very interesting and while I have been reading it to help me as I am starting a new project I know nothing about, which by the way has nothing to do with not eating sugar, I am finding the things she says in here apply to many things we deal with in our daily life, and not eating sugar is included in that. Here are 5 truths about Fear:
1. The fear will never go away as long as I continue to grow.
2. The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and do it.
3. The only way to feel better about myself is to go out... and do it.
4. Not only am I going to experience fear whenever I'm on unfamiliar territory, so is everyone else.
5. Pushing through fear is less frightening than living with the underlying fear that comes from a feeling of helplessness.
page 22

I love this paragraph also:
"It is reported that more than 90% of what we worry about never happens. That means that our negative worries have less than a 10% chance of being correct. If this is so, isn't being positive more realistic than being negative?" page 62
Good point, me thinks!

Lastly, I wanted to put up "The 7 ways to reclaim your power" instead of pain: This part I directly relate to myself as I am trying to reclaim my power over my diet.

1. Avoid casting blame on an external force for your bad feelings about life. Nothing outside yourself can control your thinking or your actions.
2. Avoid blaming yourself for not being in control. (This is not a contradiction to the 1st one. It is mostly saying don't be down on yourself all the time, constantly saying things such as "there I go messing up my life again", or "I'm hopeless", or "When will I ever learn?") Think positive thoughts.
3. Be aware of when and where you play the victim role. Learn the clues that tell you that you are not being responsible for what you are being, having, doing, or feeling.
4. Familiarize yourself with your biggest enemy-your Chatterbox. (That non-stop voice in your head that talks to you negatively all day)
5. Figure out the payoffs that keep you "stuck". Paradoxically, once you find them, you will probably be able to quickly become "unstuck".
6. Determine what you want in life and act on it. Stop waiting for someone to give it to you. You'll be waiting a long time.
7. Be aware of the many choices you have-in both actions and feelings--in any situation that comes your way. Choose the path that contributes to your growth and makes you feel at peace with yourself and others.
-page 58
Sorry if you're not into the psycho babble. Sometimes I like it, and this time I thought I would share. On to other things...

I had a great week. My brother visited and we did many things. I also passed up many treats, but I ate really good food too as we went out to eat three days in a row. Real food tastes so good when not tainted with sugar. I enjoyed a crab melt and salad down at Pike's market, crab stuffed trout in downtown Seattle, and ham stuffed chicken with a wonderful white sauce in the quaint little town we went to after we got off the ferry. Mmmmmmmm, simply delightful! But most of all I really enjoyed the time spent together and the things we saw and did, more than any treat I could ever buy or eat. That is what my whole journey is about. This weekend was awesome and I don't feel deprived one bit, but rather overjoyed with blessings in abundance. Have a good week everybody!