I am off to Cancun, Mexico this week for a much needed vacation. Probably more so for my husband than me but nevertheless I am taking it. We haven't really been any where so this is all new to me. My husband booked an all inclusive at the hotel. I guess that means we can order whatever and how much ever we want anytime of day. My husband is really excited for this. I am not so sure how happy I'll be ordering an extra plate of steamed vegetables, another glass of water with a lemon wedge, or my second salad, just because I can. When you go on vacation you're supposed to live a little and overindulge. At least that is what my old life used to be. Now that I am changing myself, the part that makes me really excited is to have fresh fruit, salads, seafood, and yes, vegetables available to me all the time without me having to buy, pay, prepare, and clean it up. What a dream! I think if I were to indulge in all that extra stuff I would get extremely sick since I am not used to it. One little cheat would lead to another, then try another and another. Then I would be back to where I started from or worse off. The truth is, I like eating healthy and I feel like I have already changed. It's just a test of time now to really drill it into my psyche. I've had some people tell me to just go ahead and eat whatever you want. You're on vacation. Or, you have to try this or that when you're there. It's the only place you can experience it. Or, when is the next time you'll make it back to Mexico? All of these are valid excuses, except I am not going to make any excuses. I have made a commitment to myself and I will keep it. There is always going to be a fantastic treat around the corner that you just HAVE to try. Well, I don't like that stuff anymore. So, hoping I can have seconds with the fresh shrimp or crab, and how about another plate of fresh fruit. Yum!
Now, having said that, this is an interesting observation for me. On Valentine's day weekend, I didn't cheat one time, yet, I had the urge to make a lot of treats and deliver them to all of my friends, neighbors, and church people. I made two batches of sugar cookies, 3 batches of frosting (different colors), 2 pans of a new recipe (something like a crumb cheesecake) and one sided homemade oreos with a little conversation heart on each one. (So cute). This took a lot of effort, money, and time. And then on top of all that I made my husband deliver all of the plates to friends, neighbors and church people because I ran out of time and I was too tired. When he delivered it to my friends, they later told me, that he told them, "This is a silly thing to do for someone who isn't eating any sugar for a year." After I heard he had said that a couple of times, I thought, you know he is right. Why am I doing all this? Of course it was for my friends and also I had a lot of fun creating these beautiful things. But I know some people that got plates are trying to watch their weight also and I am not sure they even appreciated having it around. The more I thought about this, the more disappointed in myself I became. Here's why. I am trying to change my self. This whole project should have been a lot simpler. I don't need to spend that much time and money and energy doing something that is going to make other people unhealthy, and especially my own kids. Also, through my example, I am teaching my kids this is the thing you do every Valentine's Day. I was disappointed because it was a bad example to them and also "Much ado about nothing". I love that phase and am going to try to avoid doing just that in the future. I think the thought was great and it could of been just one type of cookie or just a simple little non -food item from Target or a craft store to celebrate the holiday instead of a 3 day project. Yikes. -Well this is why I am on this journey. I am learning lots of things about my thoughts, actions/behavior. Live and learn. Off to enjoy the sun and clear skies!
Report for last week: Up 1.2 pounds. Frustrating, as I started running the last 2 weeks. Good thing I am in it for the long run, or typically this would be the point where I'd have to call on Ben and Jerry, and the Dr. (Dr. Pepper) to feed my frustration.